all about life

i'm struck anew by the idea that we all want to be invited on an adventure; to be part of something so much bigger than ourselves.

this, the 14th anniversary of my mentor and dear friend's transition to heaven, seems like a perfect day to attempt to gather my thoughts on life and our realms of influence.  

what i will refer to as our small self (the me/myself/i story) matters and yet is not meant to be an end in and of itself.  if that's all there is, well, it's quite lonely.  but if it culminates into an epic shared tale marked by "us, we, and our" that's quite another thing altogether!

words matter to me.  a lot.  and the difference between a simple noun and verb hit me right between the eyes in regards to all this lately.

consider the word "belief".  as a noun, it can represent a host of things we have formulated over time that help us navigate the world.  it could be about anything, but as a "thing" unexamined, is like being asleep or navigating on auto pilot.  it can also become stagnate, a wall that divides and keeps us at odds with those who have a different structure.  it can keep us in our small self.  (how long did people argue, for example, about their belief that the world was flat to the exclusion of even wondering otherwise?) with belief as a noun, others are either right or wrong, in or out, included or excluded.

consider the verb form "believing".  it's the explorer who dares suspend belief to offer that the world is round!  this to me is alive, dynamic.  it speaks to me of being in right relationship, asks for an active response, an adjustment, keeps us honest, curious and hopefully humble and alert as well.  the verb form is active rather than passive and leads to receiving and being received, knowing and being known. believing is the territory of discovery and there's room for everyone.

when i ask myself if i am believing in love, for example, it gives me the same feeling as when the teacher called on me by name out of my doodling or daydreaming state and invited me to wake up and rejoin the class so to speak.  i can have a belief that love exists, for example, which doesn't really change much.  or i can be believing in it each moment of every day and that requires me to show up with my whole self.

love's nature is to be unconditional, inclusive, and expansive.  when i look at a marriage or any organization, for instance, my first question is are more people being loved because these two people or businesses are together?  what is the fruit?

two wise questions i've heard lately that i keep mulling over...

one:  "in regards to your beliefs, are you about loving others (creating space for the bigger "we") or just loving yourself (insistent that they agree with you, the small "me")?"--the owner of roots and refuge farm.

two:  "is life about you or are you about life?"--richard rohr

ouch.  let's be honest, these questions can really sting the ego!

as a practical example, it's been quite a year for me employment-wise.  for all sorts of reasons and situations, i have found myself bounced from job to job to the point of near-despair.  in my small self it's tempting to think "what a broken road!"  but when i open up to the bigger story, i can reframe this, taking myself out of the center of the story.  what if design had it in mind, for example, that there was a larger array of people that needed to be served?  what if being moved from place to place was the only way to meet that bigger goal?  

or consider a dear friend of mine who was struggling with her reassignment because it wasn't making her happy.  so much joy flooded her heart when she was able to take herself out of the center to see the needs of the people she was being called to serve.

a movement from our small self to the bigger collective is, ironically, almost always certain to bring a greater sense of purpose and happiness to us as well as unity and connection with humanity.

our small self can be so addicted to the immediate gratification of our own story, but where is the legacy in social media feeds that are already old news after twenty minutes?  where do they go and who really knows or cares?  i wonder what would happen if we used every tool available to us to connect to the we/us/our?

i'm curious as to what you think about the difference between belief as a noun versus believing as a verb?  and i'd love to hear how these questions strike you; how you notice ways to let your small self lead you into the bigger story?