the intern
a month or two ago, i saw a fabulous movie: "the intern" starring robert de niro and anne hathaway. de niro plays a widower responding to an add for senior interns at the new york fashion company managed by hathaway. i can't recommend this movie highly enough for the character development and mutually beneficial relationship that is set into motion.
when people or magazines talk about retirement, the focus is usually financial (as it should be because without money you can't eat or do the things you need and want to do!) but the movie started me thinking of all the other important aspects to consider in an effort to round out the retirement picture. note that my entry is based both on observation of others (one of my primary ways of learning) and a personal desire of how i want to set my trajectory between the ages of 20-60 and beyond...this is a letter to my 43 year-old self:
emotions: take stock of patterns, both your strengths and mistakes. you are responsible for your own happiness. accept the invitation to leave childish ways behind in order to grow up into your best self. make personal growth and awareness a normal part of your life and surround yourself with people that are healthy for you and whom you wish to be like as you age. have a diverse range of guides (professional and personal, people and books) to help normalize and support you amid the inevitable conflicts, life stages, and curve-balls that come with living so you have a wide range of tools in your emotional intelligence toolbox. making it a point to know and understand yourself first reduces the need to blame and increases freedom and joy. every situation can be an opportunity for transformation, empathy, and compassion. people are drawn to intentional growth mindset like light.
social: aging being what it is, it might be a good idea to develop friends of all ages. while comforting to go through life with our peers, it can be depressing and not good for our mental health when everyone we know seems to be declining in health at the same time. mix it up! we can all learn from each other in community and can help with everything from weddings and care home visits to memorial services and graduation parties. hanging out with young people--and those young at heart--at any age is contagious.
spirituality: spiritual stages are invitations to take stock of your journey so far and find out who God is in it. this will be constantly in flux as you grow and try to understand the world and your place in it. just like with emotions, having a good coach or people you can discuss doubts and dynamics of faith in a fallen world with can really help you go the distance. creating a mutual support system enables you to be an encourager as well as having a built-in network for receiving when you need it most.
work: retire a little each year if possible. if you can, start cutting back some things a little at the same time as dialing others up. decide how much you need to live on--both you and your work place will benefit from a better you. work to your strengths and ask for help with things that just aren't a natural fit. by the same token, make sure to keep yourself from the downside of wisdom and experience: coasting. the goal is always to stay in the sweet spot of having just enough challenge to be energized and on the learning and growth curve. stick to your strengths AND try new things. this is a great season to try different roles in the same arenas in an effort to go the distance.
stuff: this is also a great time in life to inventory your possessions while you still can. how much is enough/too much? are your priorities in things, travel, new experiences? is it beautiful? useful? how can you be like the people in your heritage in terms of character traits and pass those stories on while traveling light in the process? generosity of spirit and material resources both matter. what is the right mix for you?
health: in a word, prevention. DNA aside, find out what you can control and focus on that. something is going to get us, but there's alot we can do to stay healthy and well at every stage. know your family history and know your numbers: blood pressure, sugar, weight, cholesterol. start assembling a team: doctor, dentist, masseuse, naturopath, counselor/coach, fitness trainer. and focus on overall wellness; nourishment, not diets. go natural whenever possible and be willing to pay the grocer more for the organic products and supplements you enjoy or that you deem a part of your personal wellness cart. keep moving! stretching, balance, and flexibility to help resist breakage from falls and as much laughter as possible. a cheerful heart is the best medicine.
and, finally, community: start volunteering now. "what would you do with a spare day?" make a list of your favorite non-profits or places that you frequent as a customer or client. find out what the possibilities are between their needs and your offerings. pay attention to what brings you and others the most joy and do more of that. it is likely a good fit. experiment and try everything from libraries and hospitals to government agencies or environmental groups until you find your place of service. you'll know it when you do and so will they.
the best part about life is we never arrive. i always plan to keep to some routine and i never plan to "retire" in so much as to continue to seize life with gusto in many different ways as the years increase. i want to be life's perpetual intern...
when people or magazines talk about retirement, the focus is usually financial (as it should be because without money you can't eat or do the things you need and want to do!) but the movie started me thinking of all the other important aspects to consider in an effort to round out the retirement picture. note that my entry is based both on observation of others (one of my primary ways of learning) and a personal desire of how i want to set my trajectory between the ages of 20-60 and beyond...this is a letter to my 43 year-old self:
emotions: take stock of patterns, both your strengths and mistakes. you are responsible for your own happiness. accept the invitation to leave childish ways behind in order to grow up into your best self. make personal growth and awareness a normal part of your life and surround yourself with people that are healthy for you and whom you wish to be like as you age. have a diverse range of guides (professional and personal, people and books) to help normalize and support you amid the inevitable conflicts, life stages, and curve-balls that come with living so you have a wide range of tools in your emotional intelligence toolbox. making it a point to know and understand yourself first reduces the need to blame and increases freedom and joy. every situation can be an opportunity for transformation, empathy, and compassion. people are drawn to intentional growth mindset like light.
social: aging being what it is, it might be a good idea to develop friends of all ages. while comforting to go through life with our peers, it can be depressing and not good for our mental health when everyone we know seems to be declining in health at the same time. mix it up! we can all learn from each other in community and can help with everything from weddings and care home visits to memorial services and graduation parties. hanging out with young people--and those young at heart--at any age is contagious.
spirituality: spiritual stages are invitations to take stock of your journey so far and find out who God is in it. this will be constantly in flux as you grow and try to understand the world and your place in it. just like with emotions, having a good coach or people you can discuss doubts and dynamics of faith in a fallen world with can really help you go the distance. creating a mutual support system enables you to be an encourager as well as having a built-in network for receiving when you need it most.
work: retire a little each year if possible. if you can, start cutting back some things a little at the same time as dialing others up. decide how much you need to live on--both you and your work place will benefit from a better you. work to your strengths and ask for help with things that just aren't a natural fit. by the same token, make sure to keep yourself from the downside of wisdom and experience: coasting. the goal is always to stay in the sweet spot of having just enough challenge to be energized and on the learning and growth curve. stick to your strengths AND try new things. this is a great season to try different roles in the same arenas in an effort to go the distance.
stuff: this is also a great time in life to inventory your possessions while you still can. how much is enough/too much? are your priorities in things, travel, new experiences? is it beautiful? useful? how can you be like the people in your heritage in terms of character traits and pass those stories on while traveling light in the process? generosity of spirit and material resources both matter. what is the right mix for you?
health: in a word, prevention. DNA aside, find out what you can control and focus on that. something is going to get us, but there's alot we can do to stay healthy and well at every stage. know your family history and know your numbers: blood pressure, sugar, weight, cholesterol. start assembling a team: doctor, dentist, masseuse, naturopath, counselor/coach, fitness trainer. and focus on overall wellness; nourishment, not diets. go natural whenever possible and be willing to pay the grocer more for the organic products and supplements you enjoy or that you deem a part of your personal wellness cart. keep moving! stretching, balance, and flexibility to help resist breakage from falls and as much laughter as possible. a cheerful heart is the best medicine.
and, finally, community: start volunteering now. "what would you do with a spare day?" make a list of your favorite non-profits or places that you frequent as a customer or client. find out what the possibilities are between their needs and your offerings. pay attention to what brings you and others the most joy and do more of that. it is likely a good fit. experiment and try everything from libraries and hospitals to government agencies or environmental groups until you find your place of service. you'll know it when you do and so will they.
the best part about life is we never arrive. i always plan to keep to some routine and i never plan to "retire" in so much as to continue to seize life with gusto in many different ways as the years increase. i want to be life's perpetual intern...
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