the pace of love
my 83-year-old friend had to have a medical procedure this week called a "cardio version" that stopped his heart and restarted it at a slower pace. he is resting at command of his doctor and i save his emails reminding me that we are all being renewed inwardly day by day. my hand went to my own chest several times this week over the pace of love. sometimes slowly, sometimes quickly but always mysteriously; how we can feel the effects of agape, philos or eros in our own literal heart muscle. being on both the giving and receiving sides of pure, spontaneous and heart-felt "i love you's" this week was sheer gift. (including, but not limited to a massive dog-pile of 6th graders!)
love in community is both puzzle and puzzle piece. it's a word we use a lot today for everything from small groups to housing developments. i am reminded of the classic "life together" by dietrich bonhoeffer in which he writes of the importance of time alone and time with others. vanier also outlines these concepts poignantly in his book about the subject. "perfect love" or teleios, being the goal.
alone. i initiate a lot so it took me, for example, a while to recognize that three slow and unexpected days alone at the coast last weekend was actually an invitation to let myself be loved. my spiritual director framed it this way, "faith is overcoming our trained inability to perceive God's presence when it is right in front of us" (walter wink) especially, she added, when it's not our own idea. love--*genuine, unselfish, others-focused, sacrificial love--when it comes to us always produces more. (*the gospel of john is a mirror that most severely challenges in this regard.)
with others. like breathing, this exhale of time alone created room for more air; a series of inhales in the form of observations and reciprocity that brought healing, connection and renewal. i noticed the week finished with exactly three days of celebrating with others. from seeing travel slides through the himalayas and being invited to a white linen graduation feast to receiving beautiful ceramic art and attending amazing aerial theater (which just happened to be called "love always") the rhythm was fast. so many forms of love, both new and nostalgic. when i wasn't driving all over the city, for some reason it all made me want to dig out old love letters. i read them while wearing grandpa's suede hat. and even called my mother.
whether puzzle or piece, this is one heart that wants to operate more and more at the pace of Love.
love in community is both puzzle and puzzle piece. it's a word we use a lot today for everything from small groups to housing developments. i am reminded of the classic "life together" by dietrich bonhoeffer in which he writes of the importance of time alone and time with others. vanier also outlines these concepts poignantly in his book about the subject. "perfect love" or teleios, being the goal.
alone. i initiate a lot so it took me, for example, a while to recognize that three slow and unexpected days alone at the coast last weekend was actually an invitation to let myself be loved. my spiritual director framed it this way, "faith is overcoming our trained inability to perceive God's presence when it is right in front of us" (walter wink) especially, she added, when it's not our own idea. love--*genuine, unselfish, others-focused, sacrificial love--when it comes to us always produces more. (*the gospel of john is a mirror that most severely challenges in this regard.)
with others. like breathing, this exhale of time alone created room for more air; a series of inhales in the form of observations and reciprocity that brought healing, connection and renewal. i noticed the week finished with exactly three days of celebrating with others. from seeing travel slides through the himalayas and being invited to a white linen graduation feast to receiving beautiful ceramic art and attending amazing aerial theater (which just happened to be called "love always") the rhythm was fast. so many forms of love, both new and nostalgic. when i wasn't driving all over the city, for some reason it all made me want to dig out old love letters. i read them while wearing grandpa's suede hat. and even called my mother.
whether puzzle or piece, this is one heart that wants to operate more and more at the pace of Love.
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